More than in any previous time period, I worry about how children are hurried to grow up “faster than life.” As parents, we hurry children when we push them to do things they are not ready to do according to their own unique maturation time-table (weaning from the breast, bottle, pacifier, etc.; eating solid foods; using the toilet; learning to read; and taking piano lessons are a few examples). 

Our schools hurry children as the curriculum continues to be “pushed down”.  What was once taught in 4^th grade is now taught in third and second grade and even, in some cases, kindergarten, and with a heavy focus on academics, children of all ages are not given the crucial time they need to learn through play (David Elkind’s books, The Hurried Child and The Power of Play outline the importance of play in a child’s life and education ). 

The media hurries children.  Movies that were once rated “R” are now rated “PG”, and with technology becoming part of children’s day-to-day lives as in no other previous time, children as young as infants are exposed to images they might not have been in contact with for many years. 

Ironically, when children are pushed to learn something before they’re physically, cognitively, or emotionally ready, it actually slows their progress down. 

As poignantly and painfully illustrated in the following excerpt from Zorba the Greek by Nikos Kazantzakis, there are consequences to hurrying.  

Faster Than Life

                “I remembered one morning when I discovered a cocoon in the bark of a tree, just as a butterfly was making a hole in its case preparing to come out.  I waited awhile, but it was too long appearing and I was impatient.  I bent over and breathed on it to warm it.  I warmed it as quickly as I could and the miracle began to happen before my eyes, faster than life.  The case opened, the butterfly started slowly crawling out and I shall never forget my horror when I saw how its wings were folded back and crumpled; the wretched butterfly tried with its whole trembling body to unfold them.  Bending over it, I tried to help it with my breath.  In vain.

                It needed to be hatched out patiently and the unfolding of the wings should be a gradual process in the sun.  Now it was too late.  My breath had forced the butterfly to appear, all crumpled, before its time.  It struggled desperately and, a few seconds later, died in the palm of my hand.

                That little body is, I do believe, the greatest weight I have on my conscience.  For I realize today that it is a mortal sin to violate the great laws of nature.  We should not hurry, we should not be impatient, but we should confidently obey the internal rhythm.”

So, Dear Parents,

Slow down.

Trust your child’s innate timetable.

And most importantly, enjoy the present moment!

I wish you all the best.

Happy Spring!

With loving~

melody

April 2010

www.awakenedheartparenting.com

Our program at Riviera PlaySchool is centered around helping young children develop their innate gifts, and spend time being a child!  We offer a humanistic, constructivist, and mindful preschool program for the “whole child,” inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Bev Bos, Montessori, Waldorf, and Compassionate or Non-violent Communication (NVC). 

Lots of Love,

Linda