Now, typically I would simply agree, but something told me not to on that day.  So instead of putting pen to paper, I said “Nandu, I will write it.  But why don’t you?”

Linda!  Nandu puffed out in exasperation “I CAN’T write!  I’m just 4!!”

“I looked at her “Nandu” do you know what writing is?”

“No” she said, eyes wide in wonder.

“Writing is just some marks that you make to remind yourself of what you wanted to say.  It is kind of a code.”

“Really?!” Said Nandu, in delight.

“Yes!” I said “And someday, you will learn a set of marks that everyone else can read, as well.  But right now, you can just make your own and that will work.”

“Ok!” she said.  And she excitedly began putting her story down on paper, shielding her paper from my prying eyes as she wrote.

What a success story!  We don’t want to extinguish their excitement for learning… we want to light their fire for it.

Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, CA
Parenting From Balance
A mindful, “kid-centric” hands-on learning preschool program for the “whole child,” in a nature-ful, organic environment.  Riviera PlaySchool is inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia and Non-Violent Communication.

It is guaranteed to stop a child in his tracks and turn their happy, healthy, neuron-growing science exploration into a tirade of tears in seconds.

So what do we do instead?

We look for the need…and offer a solution:

“What’s your plan?  Are you wanting to balance things?  Hmmmm…..my antique tiffany china won’t work because it may break.  How about using these blocks instead?”

At Riviera PlaySchool, “What’s your plan?” is a common question. (And it’s a question that provides a some breathing space for us to de-charge and get into response mode!)

We, as teachers and parents, have a role where we provide some guidance, a lot of trust to allow our children the freedom to explore (and thus fuel their brain growth), and plenty of compassionate understanding that they are doing their best.

“Providing” a limit, to me, is ”giving” help to my child with where he needs to set a limit on his actions so he can then connect with society (and ultimately not be an outcast.)  Understanding limits allows my child greater freedom.  He now has a choice:  he can choose whether he wants to be part of, or apart from, society, when he understands society’s limits.  Then he has empathy for others. (It’s all in the same bucket)

All of us, including our children, really just want to connect.

The trick is that the limits must be age-appropriate.  We have greatly different expectations for 2 year olds than for 4 year old.  (If you have not had Early Childhood Development training you can read the series “Your 2 Year Old, Your 3 Year Old, Your 4 Year Old, etc. to understand what age-appropriate expectations means.)

Bev Bos uses an analogy of a child starting out on top of a mountain.  They begin on the top of their mountain of egocentricity.  As they travel through their various developmental stages, they are slowly making their way down that mountain.  Society sits at the bottom of the mountain.  It is our job to guide them, down the mountain…  And I like to add, to guide them down that mountain with their gifts intact.

—

At Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, California, we provide
a mindful program for the ‘Whole Child,’ inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia, Bev Bos, Montessori, Waldorf and Non-Violent Communication.

Wherever you go, it is the staff who make a school what it is.  And the staff at Riviera PlaySchool are all grounded in the same philosophy — that of non violent communication, and mindfulness.  You will notice that every interaction between child and adult has a consistent and tangible feeling of respect and compassion.  And when any conflict occurs, it is a true learning moment, and teachers are on hand to hold space for the children to resolve their own conflicts.  We try not to rush to a resolution of our adult creation.  Sometimes children can take a while to sort a conflict out to a place they deem to be “fair.”.  And we give them space to take the time to do that, while offering support, and helping them keep bodies and hearts safe.  We pay particular attention to where we are during the conflict.  We stay on the sidelines, energetically.  We don’t jump into the fray reactively.  If we notice our speech becoming more rapid, or our voice becoming louder, then that’s a signal to us to take a step back and let them have their own emotions about the conflict at hand.  It’s pretty tricky, and it keeps us more awake as people.  It is an incredibly magical thing to witness a couple of small children figure out a workable solution to their volatile dilemma…and then walk away laughing together, more emotionally and socially intelligent than before.

Riviera PlaySchool is mainly child-directed.  In other words, the teachers at PlaySchool meet the children where they are.  Not just physically, by getting down on the same level when we speak, but also energetically, by being in the moment, and celebrating in their successes, and joining them in the joy of creation.

In the tradition of Reggio Emilia and Bev Bos, we know that the environment is also a teacher.   So in the classroom (both outdoors and inside) we facilitate enriching environments within which the children can learn through freely allowed exploration.  And we know that the very best “toys” and “tools” for this exploration are the ones that are open-ended and undefined.

We like to make opportunities to allow for magic in our teaching by providing lots of parts of things for the children: tape, boxes, spools, pipe cleaners, twine, wire, glue-paint, glitter, scissors, tongue depressors, yarn, pom poms, cardboard tubes, corrugated cardboard, glue guns for attaching heavy parts (when building spaceships, for example) ribbon, string, fabric …

And we then let the kids lead us, and devise their own creations.  Parts allow us to create fantasies. Today we had a big box at PlaySchool. The children first painted it, then another group made it into a car, and then it became a clubhouse…. the play was emergent, organic, and fantastic.

Magic can happen in any environment if you have a few elements:

- freedom to explore

- power; permission to create

- space to create in

(I think this is also the definition of how invention happens!!)

We follow the most current practices in Early Childhood Education: we embrace and nurture the “Whole Child,” and allow each child to learn at his or her own pace.  We believe an environment that provides children with the elements listed above is best suited for every child.  Any person feels good in an environment that empowers them.

The children leaving our program understand more than just 1 + 1, they understand that 1 weighs less than 2.

Our graduates are honed for primary school:  they are well developed in all realms, cognitive, emotional, and social; they are able to resolve their own conflicts peacefully, are well-grounded, sure-footed, confident, understand themselves well, and are able to self-regulate, and have incredible critical thinking skills.

Most importantly, we believe that each person is born with at least one special, particular gift, and an environment that allows them to focus on what enthuses them is best suited to help those individual gifts emerge and become honed and developed.

As Plato said:   ”Do not train children to learning by force and harshness, but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each.”

Riviera PlaySchool offers a humanistic, constructivist, and mindful program for the “whole child,” inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia, and Non Violent (Compassionate) Communication.  We are also inspired by the fun and freedom to explore of Bev Bos, the beautiful and abundant nature of Waldorf, and Maria Montessori’s easily digestible, experiential approach to learning.

Come join us for a visit!

Linda Shannon

www.RivieraPlaySchool.com

We start to lose our lovely multifaceted selves, and become simply, “mom.”  As lovely as the word is, it is not sufficient to express fully the beautiful essence of who we are… We would never willingly describe ourselves with a single adjective, just as we would never intend to limit our child to being simply “a son.”

So the question is, what about YOU? Remember the oxygen mask rule: when flying, we are instructed to, in case of a loss in air quality, put the mask on ourselves before helping our child. The same goes for life: take care of yourself well, so you can have enough to share with your child and your family. Hire a sitter or swap with a friend so you can each have some mommy time, and fill yourself back up so there more MOMMY to go around!!!!

And beware, moms — sometimes we feel guilty when we want to hire a caregiver because we feel we are depriving our child of us… but actually, we are giving them a gift: we are giving them time to be with themselves, and with someone who is dedicated to paying full attention to them. And because we are able to replenish ourselves during that time, the net sum is that we are actually giving them MORE of ourselves, not less!

Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, CA
Parenting From Balance
A mindful, “kid-centric” hands-on learning preschool program for the “whole child,” in a nature-ful, organic environment.  Riviera PlaySchool is inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia and Non-Violent Communication.

I just have to say that “helicoptering”  is not only unnecessary, but it steals your child’s confidence….it damages their connection to their personal “inner compass”  (that thing that allows then to learn through pure observation)…and replaces it with a radar that tunes to us for their navigational information.  You see the dillemma, right?  If they defer to our lead and fail to develop their own inner guidance, then they will defer to someone else’s lead when they leave our nest.

One Night Stand:  DECEMBER 6,  7:00 pm to 9:00 pm

This class is free to Riviera PlaySchool parents.  (RSVP required at: (310) 529-6209)

All others can register online at:  http://www.apeacefulparent.com/events/

XXX

Linda

Once there was a king, who had a beautiful, large pure diamond.  There was no other diamond like it in the world.   One day, it became deeply scratched.  The king called his best diamond cutters, “I’ll promise you a great reward if you can remove the imperfection from my jewel.”  But they could not.  The king was very upset. 

Many months later, a man came to the king.  He promised to make the diamond even more beautiful than it ever had been.  Impressed by the man’s confidence, the king consented.  He watched as the man engraved an exquisite rosebud around the blemish and used the scratch to make its stem.

–A parable of the Preacher of Dubno from Jewish folklore.

and will run through Friday, February 17, 2012.  Enrollment for the 2011 year is on-going.  We hope you will join one of our Parent Information Nights

which will be held in our classroom at St.Andrew's Church in Redondo Beach.

Enrolling 5-7 Year Old Students - Please attend one or more of the following
Tuesday, November 15, 2011 - 7:00pm
Tuesday, December 13, 2011 - 7:00pm
Monday, January 30, 2012 - 7:00pm (“Changing Education Paradigms” Workshop with Melody Elder)

Register at http://enrollattkg.eventbrite.com/

The application is available at knowinggarden.org

--Our classroom is open. We are not improving on the existing model, we are part of the movement that is redefining elementary school.

-- Every student keeps a portfolio of work to showcase their individual growth.

-- We use the State Standards only as a touchstone for inspiring projects.  We do not test nor assess based on those standards

-- Every student spends time analyzing, integrating, and applying concepts to real-life learning opportunities. Compared to traditional schools, our day includes conflict resolution,

community meetings, more writing and project-based assignments, zero fill-in-the-blanks worksheets and currently, no homework.

-- Every student participates in Math, Science and Engineering, Language Arts, Storytelling,  Music, Art, Environmental studies and Physical activity

all facilitated by a credentialed teacher. 

The Knowing Garden is a non-profit, private school open to anyone.  Priority goes to students who apply during the Open Enrollment period.

by Janet Gonzalez- Mena, MA  “Child Family and Community”

A narrow and simplistic view of what is “Ready to Learn” focuses on teaching academics to young children.  This view ignores the huge societal changes that need to come about to ensure that all children have an equal chance for academic achievement in school. To truly have an equal chance for school success we need to eradicate poverty. give everybody health care benefits, ensure enough nutritious food, and provide decent housing.  Focusing on early academics is a cheaper but far less effective road to school success than what the brain research indicates.  Good health and social -emotional stability in the early years of life are the real roads to later achievement.  Cognitive development is vitally tied to  the social-emotional realm of development (Lally, 1998; Shore, 1997; Zigler, Finn-Stevenson, & Hall, 2003)  Instead of working toward a decent life for every child, the major societal approach is to use standardized tests to see who is behind in academic skills and then use remediation devices to catch them up.  It will take a few years to discover that this band-aid approach won’t work to take care of the wounds too many children in this country suffer in their early years.

It may not take years to discover the other problems inherent in basing educational systems solely around standardized tests.  Testing works as a stratifying tool through cultural bias.  Teachers, in order to raise their class test scores, find themselves “teaching to the test,” which means  they minimize problem solving and creativity i their classroom activities.  The tests dictate what children need to know regardless of their knowledge, experiences, and cultural differences.

Kindergarten readiness, a hot topic among politicians, is also a hot topic among parents.  With this in mind, let’s look at how kindergarten readiness goes far beyond learning the ABC’s and starts way back in infancy.  Here are some general indicators that early childhood educators agree show children are prepared to enter kindergarten:

1. Children who are ready for kindergarten are those who feel good about themselves.

The problem is that much of the discipline used makes children feel bad about themselves.  Children don’t feel good about themselves  by being made to feel bad.  Discipline should not only leave self-esteem intact but should also actually raise it when adults use modeling, guidance, and feedback.  Communication is an important part of discipline; adults should discuss feelings and behavior instead of criticizing  the child.  Adults who understand the importance of communication separate the child from the behavior, saying things like “I won’t let you hit your sister – it hurts her” instead of “Stop that, you bad boy!”

2. Children who are ready for kindergarten are those who gain knowledge from mistakes.

Some of the best lessons come from things that don’t work.  It’s easy to take the lesson out of the mistake by rescuing children so they don’t learn about the consequences of their actions.  Or the opposite situation occurs when the adult reacts to a mistake with harsh punishment.  When children become fearful of mistakes, they quit risking.  Reasonable risks are good learning devices.  This child who avoids them misses out on a lot of important lessons.

3. Children who are ready for kindergarten can communicate.

They have lots of experience in talking and listening.  They know how to carry on a conversation.  A conversation means not just talking but listening and responding appropriately as well.  Adults should start emphasizing communication early.  Even infants enjoy conversation and taking turns “talking.”  They also play with language.  As children grow older, keeping a playful attitude toward language helps encourage it.

4. Children who are ready for kindergarten can weigh alternatives and make sound choices.

Visualizing alternatives and their consequences in an important life skill.  Children who arrive in kindergarten with plenty of opportunities to practice this skill come better prepared.  When the “prepared child” gets hit by another child, she asks herself, “What are some ways I can react, and what are the consequences of each?”  The child without the ability to visualize alternatives just lashes back without thinking.  Aggression, in the face of aggression is a poor choice.  Some children never learn that, unfortunately.  Some children have no ability to imagine any response other than hitting.

5. Children who are ready for kindergarten can concentrate and focus

If they can’t do that, the problem may be too much television.  It might seem as though children develop a long attention span from watching television, because they are willing to sit and stare at it for long hours.  But turn it off and what happens?  They don’t know how to entertain themselves.  We add to the problem by over scheduling their time.  Children don’t develop long attention spans when they are never allowed to play for long periods, never free to follow their inclinations to get involved in something of their own choice, never encouraged to work at length on some project they are interested in (Elkind, 2007).  Adults tend to interrupt children, hurry them up, get them going on the next event.  Preschool programs can contribute to the problem if they keep children on a tight schedule, move them rapidly from one activity to another, and never give them a chance to work at length or in depth on anything.

No Child Left Behind has no redeemable qualities.  It is creating children who lack critical thinking skills, are less able to manage themselves socially, and classrooms that disenfranchise children based on their intelligence.  The effect of linking accountability to achievement as proved by testing is to make the teaches anxious to have only the most teachable students in their classroom.  What if your child is not a “star” in every subject…. would you want her or him to be made to feel unwanted?

Just passing this on….from Linda, with Love.

Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, CA
PARENTING FROM BALANCE
A Mindful program for the ‘Whole Child,’ inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia, Montessori, Waldorf and Non-Violent (Compassionate or Authentic) Communication.

www.RivieraPlaySchool.com

“People are people no matter how small.”  ~ Horton

This one night only course is offered on 2 different occassions and can serve as a refresher course for those who have already done the Parenting With Spirit series (see above) or as an introduction to Peaceful Parenting for newcomers. One of the most fundamental elements of Peaceful Parenting is the ability to make a shift from our standard ways of thinking about conflict in our families. This mini-workshop will give a brief overview of compassionate communication with a focus on creative problem solving. The format will be a combination of instruction and group sharing of personal questions and challenges. Please join us!