It is Never too Early to Begin Reasoning with your Child.

Parenting can be like tobogganing down a flight of stairs on a swatch of cardboard: smooth and easy, with just a couple of (well placed) bumps and bruises!  A good guideline for accomplishing this is to swap shoes with your child: treat them as you would like to be treated.  And like Horton says: “People are People no Matter How Small.”

My son (who is not a genius though I would like to think he is) could communicate his feelings very well at 18 months.  He told me that there were “too many kids” at nursery school, he told me that “Walter is my mean friend” because “he hits me” and much more. Pretty sophisticated communication for a tot who was still cutting his linguistic teeth.  And yet, in my experience, this level of communication it is simply typical of what the children at playschool are capable of.

At playschool, we start from a place of assuming that the children may be able to understand at least part of our communication.  If we were instead to assume they could not understand, then the limits would be instantly set in stone (by us!)  So instead, while we don’t require them to understand, we do provide them with an opportunity to if they are able.

And we don’t forget that even non verbal cues (our actions) are an impressive and sometimes indelible form of communication.

As you know, in the world of NVC (which includes playschool, of course) we do not punish as a way to control behavior.  Instead, we view behavior as a tactic to meet an unmet need.  We look under the behavior to identify the unmet need, and then coach the child with a better, more successful tactic they could use instead.  Punishment teaches nothing more than bullying.  Especially in the case of hitting — how would punishment teach a person that hitting/hurting is not OK?  How would hurting a person teach them not to hurt others?

In the case with many children who hit, they often have caretakers who use force with them.  They do so with the best of intentions — for example, they pull things out of their children’s hands out of fear that the child will hurt themselves or break the object in question, or they move their child bodily rather than asking them to move.  But the net result is that they use force as a means to control behavior. This teaches the child, very experientially, to use force with other children as a way to engage, and to control.

A good guideline for interacting with children is to swap shoes: we like to strive to treat others as we would like to be treated.  And from there, it is all like tobogganing down a flight of stairs on a swatch of cardboard: smooth and easy, with just a couple of bumps and bruises!

Love,

Linda

Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, CA

TEACHING FROM BALANCE

A Mindful program for the ‘Whole Child,’ inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia, Montessori, Waldorf and Compassionate Communication.

You have to watch this…it’s about an amazing school in Bali that teaches the 3 R’s, and so much more!  These kids come to expect a “whole” education, and the founders hope that, as a result, they will demand a “Whole” World!

http://www.ted.com/talks/john_hardy_my_green_school_dream.html

XOXO

Linda Shannon

Ready to Learn

Now, Everything you need to know to get your child ready for kindergarten!

by Janet Gonzalez- Mena, MA  “Child Family and Community”

A narrow and simplistic view of what is “Ready to Learn” focuses on teaching academics to young children.  Focusing on early academics is a cheaper but far less effective road to school success than what the brain research indicates.  Good health and social -emotional stability in the early years of life are the real roads to later achievement.  Cognitive development is vitally tied to  the social-emotional realm of development (Lally, 1998; Shore, 1997; Zigler, Finn-Stevenson, & Hall, 2003)

Kindergarten readiness, a hot topic among politicians, is also a hot topic among parents.  With this in mind, let’s look at how kindergarten readiness goes far beyond learning the ABC’s and starts way back in infancy.

Here are some general indicators that early childhood educators agree show children are prepared to enter kindergarten:

1. Children who are ready for kindergarten are those who feel good about themselves.

The problem is that much of the discipline used makes children feel bad about themselves.  Children don’t feel good about themselves  by being made to feel bad.  Discipline should not only leave self-esteem intact but should also actually raise it when adults use modeling, guidance, and feedback.  Communication is an important part of discipline; adults should discuss feelings and behavior instead of criticizing  the child.  Adults who understand the importance of communication separate the child from the behavior, saying things like “I won’t let you hit your sister – it hurts her” instead of “Stop that, you bad boy!”

2. Children who are read for kindergarten are those who gain knowledge from mistakes.

Some of the best lessons come from things that don’t work.  It’s easy to take the lesson out of the mistake by rescuing children so they don’t learn about the consequences of their actions.  Or the opposite situation occurs when the adult reacts to a mistake with harsh punishment.  When children become fearful of mistakes, they quit risking.  Reasonable risks are good learning devices.  This child who avoids them misses out on a lot of important lessons.

3. Children who are ready for kindergarten can communicate.

They have lots of experience in talking and listening.  They know how to carry on a conversation.  A conversation means not just talking but listening and responding appropriately as well.  Adults should start emphasizing communication early.  Even infants enjoy conversation and taking turns “talking.”  They also play with language.  As children grow older, keeping a playful attitude toward language helps encourage it.

4. Children who are ready for kindergarten can weigh alternatives and make sound choices.

Visualizing alternatives and their consequences in an important life skill.  Children who arrive in kindergarten with plenty of opportunities to practice this skill come better prepared.  When the “prepared child” gets hit by another child, she asks herself, “What are some ways I can react, and what are the consequences of each?”  The child without the ability to visualize alternatives just lashes back without thinking.  Aggression, in the face of aggression is a poor choice.  Some children never learn that, unfortunately.  Some children have no ability to imagine any response other than hitting.

5. Children who are ready for kindergarten can concentrate and focus.

If they can’t do that, the problem may be too much television.  It might seem as though children develop a long attention span from watching television, because they are willing to sit and stare at it for long hours.  But turn it off and what happens?  They don’t know how to entertain themselves.  We add to the problem by over scheduling their time.  Children don’t develop long attention spans when they are never allowed to play for long periods, never free to follow their inclinations to get involved in something of their own choice, never encouraged to work at length on some project they are interested in (Elkind, 2007).  Adults tend to interrupt children, hurry them up, get them going on the next event. Preschool programs can contribute to the problem if they keep children on a tight schedule, move them rapidly from one activity to another, and never give them a chance to work at length or in depth on anything.

At Riviera PlaySchool we nurture children in all of the aforementioned ways, so that social, emotional, and cognitive intelligence is developed to full capacity.  Learning through play, and experiential learning, is the way children learn, and we honor that.

Lots of Love,  Linda

Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, CA

TEACHING FROM BALANCE

A Mindful program for the ‘Whole Child,’ inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Reggio Emilia, Montessori, Waldorf and Non-Violent (Compassionate) Communication.

“Wisdom begins in wonder.    -    Socrates

“Do not train children to learning by force and harshness, but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each.”

“People are people no matter how small.”  ~ Horton

“Kids want to explore.  They look at something and ask ‘How does that work?’  But we stop them from finding out… ”

“We just need to get out of our children’s way!” Neil DeGrasseTyson

DeGrasse explains why choosing an experiential preschool setting for your child, like Montessori, Waldorf, or Reggio Emilia, will best nurture his or her critical thinking skills. 

Hear Time’s 10 questions with Neil DeGrasseTyson on youtube.com

But now everyone is talking about the importance of “school readiness” before kids get to kindergarten.

That’s why many parents, anxious for their children to succeed in school, want early care and education programs to have children sit at tables using work sheets, drills, and flash cards to learn letters and numbers and even starting to read, add, and subtract.

But preschoolers learn differently from school-age children: play is essential to early learning. Play is the main way children learn and develop ideas about the world. It helps them build the skills necessary for critical thinking and leadership. It’s how they learn to solve problems and to feel good about their ability to learn.

Children learn the most from play when they have skilled teachers who are well-trained in understanding how play contributes to learning.
Most child development experts agree that play is an essential part of a high-quality early learning program. Play is not a break from learning—it’s the way young children learn.
High-quality preschools provide lasting benefits
High-quality preschool and child care programs have lasting benefits. Three studies, which followed children for many years, showed that taxpayers saved at least $2.69 for every dollar spent on high-quality early learning programs, by reducing special education, law-enforcement, and other costs.

In all these programs, “child-initiated” activities were important—highly trained teachers used children’s interests and activities to guide learning. Kids got to choose from appropriate activities, rather than spending all their time following teachers’ instructions.

Several studies have shown that children learn more from educational activities that support their own interests and ideas. Some researchers have found evidence that too much teacher-directed activity undermines young children’s self-confidence and motivation to learn.

Play promotes school success in many ways
Researchers are finding more and more connections between children’s play and the learning and social development that helps them succeed in school.
For example, pretend play helps children learn to think abstractly and to look at things from someone else’s perspective. Pretend play is also connected to early literacy, mathematical thinking, and problem-solving.

When children play:
They test their developing ideas with objects, people, and situations—the key ability for academic learning

They develop many kinds of skills together—physical, social, emotional, thinking, and language

They are doing things they are interested in, so they have a natural motivation to learn

They develop concepts and skills together. For example, as a child learns to write the letters in her name, she is also learning the concept that each letter represents a sound. And she is very motivated by the meaning—her own name! Children are more likely to remember skills and concepts they have learned by doing things that are meaningful to them

They learn from other children and develop social skills by playing together
When children play, they learn skills that contribute to school success

Using one thing to represent another
Through pretend play, children learn to use their imaginations to represent objects, people, and ideas.

What you see:
A toddler flaps her arms, pretending to be a butterfly
Another picks up a banana, holds it to his ear like a telephone, and says, “Hello.”
A preschooler builds a firehouse with blocks.

How it promotes school success:
If children can use one thing to represent something else, it’s easier for them to understand that letters represent sounds and numbers represent quantities.
And later on they will be able to their imaginations to visualize historical events or scientific ideas.

Using language and telling stories
Through pretend play, children develop their skills in using language and in telling and understanding stories.

What you see:
Children act out scenes in the housekeeping corner
A child makes her stuffed animal “talk,” telling a story

How it promotes school success:
Oral language skills and storytelling are the building blocks of reading and writing, as well as subjects like social studies and science.

Using experimentation and logic
When children play with materials such as blocks, clay, sand, and water, they develop skills in logic. They experiment with cause and effect, with counting and sorting things and solving problems.

What you see:
Children experiment with blocks to figure out how to build a stable structure
Children count the number of cups needed for a “tea party”
Children pour sand into different sized containers.

How it promotes school success:
This practice in experimenting, observing, comparing, and working with shapes, sizes, and quantities forms the basis for understanding math and science and for all higher-order thinking.

Developing self control and social skills
As children share materials and play together, they learn to cooperate, listen to others, stand up for their own ideas, handle frustration, and empathize.

What you see:
Children negotiate over roles in dramatic play: “We can both be pilots if we have two seats.”
One child cries and another says, “Don’t worry, your mom is coming soon.”

How it promotes school success:
Many studies have shown that kids with good social skills and emotional health do better in school and are more likely to avoid dangerous behavior as teenagers. Through play, children develop their ability to form relationships with other children and with teachers.

Learning to enjoy learning
When children do activities they have chosen, learning is enjoyable. It’s based on their own interests and gives them a sense of competence.

What you see:
Classrooms organized with different activity centers (blocks, dramatic play, painting and drawing, reading, science, etc.)
Children encouraged to choose their own activities.

How it promotes school success:
Studies show that children’s attitudes of curiosity, motivation, and competence are key to success in elementary school.

The teacher is key to play-based learning
Children learn more through play when they have well-trained teachers who know how to respond to, guide, and extend their play to increase learning—and how to assess their development by observing their play.

Teachers can:
Guide and extend play to help children learn more
Respond to play: A teacher sees a child playing and builds vocabulary by providing new words: “That’s interesting. You’ve lined up the animals from tiny to gigantic.”

Extend play: A teacher hears children making silly rhymes: “You’re juicy, goosey, foosey.” She extends this play by teaching songs that play with the sounds of language, such as “Apples and Bananas.” She knows that this helps children learn to recognize the separate sounds in words.
A teacher observes a child pretending a chair is a car and “driving.” She encourages imagination by asking “Where are you going? What do you see along the way?”
Guide play: One week a teacher turns the dress-up area into a shoe store. Children practice language and social skills by acting out “customers” and “sales people.” They learn new vocabulary (canvas, boots). They use art to make signs for the store. Some older preschoolers may write letters and words for the signs, or practice simple math by making change for purchases.

Assess children’s development by watching them play
Observe the child’s activities: Seeing a child line up toy dinosaurs by size shows her understanding of size comparisons and putting things in order.

Listen to the child talk: Hearing a child talk about what letters “say” shows his understanding that letters represent words.

Take photos: A series of photos of a child’s block structures over time shows that she is learning more about spatial relations.

Policy recommendations
Because play is so important to developing the skills, concepts, and approaches children will use throughout their lives, public policy should support early education that emphasizes play. Parents and child care providers can urge policymakers to:

Adopt early childhood learning standards that identify play as the primary method for early learning.

Require curricula and learning materials that emphasize play

Fund in-depth training and ongoing education for early childhood educators, including elementary school teachers, about how to use play to promote learning

Educate parents about the importance of play.

Assess young children’s learning through observation, not formal tests.

Parents can
Provide playthings that kids can use in a variety of ways: blocks, paper and crayons, dolls and toy animals, balls, playdough, etc.

Encourage kids to play with ordinary household objects like pots and pans and outdoor materials like sticks and grass

Provide simple playthings that encourage children to be active and use their imaginations, not to watch while the toy does tricks.

Play with your children, ask them questions about their play (“What are those animals doing?”), and point out things you notice (“You used a lot of bright colors in that picture!”)

Look for child care and preschool programs where children learn through play. Ask: How does this program use play to help children learn?

For more about play and learning
Zero to Three has many brochures explaining the importance of play, with tips for understanding children’s play and ideas about how to make the most of play time. 202-638-1144, www.zerotothree.org

National Association for the Education of Young Children publishes Early Years are Learning Years, short articles for parents and child care providers, including many on “play and learning.” 800-424-2460, http://www.naeyc.org/

“Time for Play Every Day: It’s Fun and Fundamental,” Alliance for Childhood, www.allianceforchildhood.net/projects/play/pdf_files/play_fact_sheet.pdf
A Place of Our Own, a television show and web site with many ideas for activities, check your local PBS listings for show times, www.aplaceofourown.org

Play at the Center of the Curriculum, by Van Hoorn, Nourot, Scales, and Alward, 4th edition, 2007, Merrill/Prentice Hall

For parenting and child care education, contact your local First 5. Info from 916-263-1050, www.ccfc.ca.gov

For the complete Early Childhood Funders policy brief including references, go to www.4children.org/play.htm

–
Riviera PlaySchool in Redondo Beach, CA
TEACHING FROM BALANCE
A Mindful program for the ‘Whole Child,’ inspired by the best of Attachment Parenting, Bev Bos, Montessori, Waldorf and Non-Violent Communication.

cell: (310)408-5616

www.RivieraPlaySchool.com

“If a child is to keep his inborn sense of wonder, he needs the companionship of at least one adult who can share it, rediscovering with him the joy, excitement and mystery of the world we live in.”
~ Rachel Carson

“People are people no matter how small.”
~ Horton